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Thursday, March 20, 2014

Out of the Darkness!

    As I climb from the depths that my recent journey has taken me, I come up to a cross roads. "Which way will bring back to the pathways of light?" I say only for myself to hear. Both appear to be the same, dark and seldom traveled paths. I check for tracks in the dirt. Though my woodland skills are not the best, I find faint foot prints leading to the left. So off to the left I go. I walk nearly a mile before I notice it. The shadows draw near. Before I can even start to run, that awful noise assaults my senses. My mind echoes the shriek that my ears are deaf to. The cacophony brings me to my knees instantly, holding my ears to block it out. My vision starts to blur. The pain is unbearable, then instantly gone. As my vision clears, I look up to see what at first I think to be ghosts.
 Suddenly, I wish it were specters to torture my soul. What I found was much worse, they were Howling Banshees. These warriors are trained for the quick, silent death. The leader was wielding a staff with blades on either end. The blades crackle with some ancient power that only the Eldar understand. She motions me to my feet and leads me further down the path. My thoughts leading me in all directions. Should I run? Should I try to overtake them? All I need is one of those swords. Unfortunately, they seem to be one step ahead of me at all times. So on I walk.

They lead me down the path further and further. It seems to go on for days. The seemingly simple animal trail widens to streets then to avenues with flowing gardens. They march me straight up to a large building. It seems like the road was only meant to go to this particular building.The banshees stop as if some invisible force would not let them cross. So, I climb the steps leading to the grand entryway of the structure. The building is old, but very well kept. The steps are flanked by large statues holding their alien weapons as if they were still at war. As I reach the top step, all of the statues come to life to block my egress. I'm not sure which is worse: the living warriors moving like ghosts or long dead Eldar trapped in a machine just to make further war. Well, no where to go but in.
     Before I can walk into this manor that time seems to have forgotten, a figure emerges from the depths. The being is wrapped in loosely flowing robes. He says nothing, just puts his left hand on my forehead. Suddenly, colors and visions jump and dance in my mind. When everything comes together, I see before me more of these automatons and walkers much larger than them. I see heavily armored beings teleporting around and unleashing their own brand of death. I see warriors with shuriken launching guns. Finally, I see this figure and I know what I see. I see the future. The Eldar will soon go to war. It is my job to get them there. Then everything goes dark on me.
   When next I open my eyes, I am at the crossroads. Instead of the dark pathways that I have been traveling, the sun is shining. My way is clear. "Follow me!" I announce, only suspecting someone was listening.

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

From even darker places

            Good Evening. While my thoughts are in dark places, I wanted to touch on a grim subject. Truly darker than the grim dark of 40k. Darker than the eternal struggles of Warhammer fantasy. What do you do when the games goes to a bad spot? Let's say you are playing a game with one of your buddies. This is your typical t, beer ( or soda for you under age gamers ) and pretzels, Friday night game. Your dice turn to a bad place, or one perfectly placed ordinance shot wipes out your "killer" unit. What do you do? Your options could include to rage quit. We all have seen this at one point or another. The yelling, red faced, miniature or dice throwing that rears his ugly head when things go terribly wrong. You can laugh about it, but we have, all of us, have seen this creature. Nobody wants to, but this abomination has more sightings than  U.F.O.s  in Nevada. This situation is BAD! This is a horrible situation. The worst part of this is when you are in a tournament of 60 or 100 or even more people. In a room full of people, where everyone has their eye on the first place prize. There is a lot of tension and it is easier to lose your cool.

   How do we diffuse this situation? Here are a couple ways to stop a bad time before it starts. There, of course, is two sides to this story. The first is the carrier's side. This spawn is usually seeded days before the game. Whether your job sucks or your better half didn't want you to to be out or a host of other problems gnawing at you. Put it away, when you get your army on the table. Next is "Bad Dice." Everyone has been a victim. Remember, if it was for the randomness of the dice, we would be able to put the models on the table & declare a winner. That's no fun. Then there is the tragic deployment, or worse yet, the "I forgot to move/ shoot that unit" otherwise known as the "Dumb Ass Move." The only thing to do is get past it. Find a new way to use that unit for the rest of the match, because the worst part of this is you will most likely lose the game over beating yourself up. Not the bad move.

     Now for the awkward side of this. The opponent. Your part in this equation could be absolutely nothing. I don't need to say this, but just be friendly. If the person across from you is starting to have the tell tale tremors, slow down, make sure they understand what is going on. Make sure you are not, purposely or subconsciously, gloating. Ask them what is bothering them. If it is a friendly game, maybe, start over. Offer them a drink. Remember, soda for those underage. That might be just enough for them to collect themselves, or make you seem like less of an ass. Always, I mean always, if things get tough. take a break. Engage them on something other than the game.

     I hope these tips help. Remember this is a social game. If we are not all having fun, Is it really worth putting all the money into it that we do. Let's all have fun. Good night for now.

Thursday, March 6, 2014

From a Dark Place

      Hi guys and girls. Today, I come back from that very dark hole I have been hiding in to bring you my latest creations. Today, at least on my dining room table, the dead rise again.... Through the darkest parts of my ambitions, and a push from my local store owner. My zombie project has come to fruition. Thirty corpses come to feed on your souls, eat your brains, and deny you kill points.

   These will be a great addition to any Nurgle themed Chaos Space Marines army. I need to get one of the Death Warden miniatures or Typhon for a Typhus stand in.

  With these done, I have decided to keep the Book of the Dead open just a little while longer. With that ancient tome in one hand and some spirit stones in the other. I plan to raise the dead one more time. We shall see what the runes foretell.....